Thursday, April 12, 2012

Things I Love Thursday - Part 33

Guess who came into work with me today? 

I give you -  GRANDMAMA.

Some of you on the IWADB Facebook Page may be familiar with Grandmama and her shall we say, prim and proper ways.  She likes to tell me I look like a whore or a prostitute, but in a nice way (not really, but I live in denial).

If it's possible, I think my skin itches even more right now with her on me.  I get pretty excited to see her, she's not very excited to see me, as you can tell here.
Most days she stays in her jewelry box and doesn't inflict judgement on anyone but me. Well, she and Sally Boy have a grand old Tea and Scones party every day, but that's about it. I can only IMAGINE the conversations that those two have. 

Today, GRANDMAMA took the train into the Tower with me and as you can see, she was doing her best to cast her disapproval on this gentleman here just trying to get to work.


"Have some pride young man and take off those mirrored sunglasses for god's sake.  You are embarrassing yourself."
She came about the first time I wore her and my Dear Sweet Husband called her that and started talking for her.  Because he's the funniest and most creative person I know.  And he married ME!  Squeeeeee! 

Therefore, she is a THING I LOVE THIS THURSDAY.

I can't do voices nearly as well as he can and when I talk for Grandmama she winds up sounding like my girl cat, Eliza.  So, in my head, all day every day, I hear things like this from my necklace, a.k.a, GRANDMAMA, a.k.a., my husband doing her voice:

  1. "You look like a prostitute."
  2. "You stink of cheese."
  3. "You look like a whore."
  4. "Your décolletage is distracting."
I think there should be a little pull thingy where she says these things all day whenever we pull her.  I NEED THAT.  Can anyone help me with that?



    14 comments:

    1. This post is foolish.

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    2. Just when I don't think I can love you any more that I already do, you go and write a blog like this that has me laughing like an idiot in my office with tears running down my face. Grandmama would not be proud of this unprofessional behavior for sure. ;-)

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    3. Oh.My.Gah. I just about choked on my nutella and graham crackers over here when I read that comment from Grandmama. Laughing my butt off.

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    4. That she swings and touches your boobies, makes me wonder if she's harboring some deep seeded anger about her placement on that chain.

      I dunno, but I'd move her up a notch and see if her attitude improves.

      "cheese"? Really? *giggles.... xoxoxO!!!

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    5. I love that Grandmama posted on this blog.
      I love that DH is in on all of this Tom Foolery.
      I especially love that Grandmama polished off your gorgeous Hepburn look today.
      Grandmama does not approve of me most days, and even though her disapproval of me when I deliver her crumpets makes me want to hit her with her heavy duty rotary phone, I resist and respect her for the old bitty that she is. She brings me too many laughs to object.

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    6. Another genuine LOL for me, today. Thank you. :D

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    7. You are hilarious and I love Grandmama...she is amazing with her disdain:) She might also say "are you planning to wear your hair that way?" <3 Thanks for the laugh doll. xoxo P.S. You look fab in that dress, LOVE!

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    8. Does Grandmamma also say "get your elbows off the table" while you're eating?

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    9. Aw hells. My comment disappeared into oblivion yesterday. I said something alongn the lines of how damn cute you look in that dress, all smiley, with Grandmama hanging around your neck.

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    10. Stupid blogger eating comments. Grandmama is not pleased.

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    11. Grandmama needs a stiff drink and a good fuck.

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    12. I can see why you don't wear that necklace often, all the comments running through your head must be distracting! "you stink of cheese" is my favorite line of your grandmama- aka your husband playing your grandmama.

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    13. Why does YOUR necklace talk in MY grandmama's voice?! 8-O

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