Monday, December 10, 2012

THERE'S NO TIME!


34 and a half weeks and OHMYGODS 34 and a half weeks! 
Don't worry - these pictures are almost done and you'll never have to see another one!
But until then, KABLAMMO.
You know what I always find disconcerting is that you know these women, family or friends or co-workers and one day they are enormously pregnant and you KNOW they are pregnant and going to have a baby or babies and yet, when one day they are huge and the next day they just HAVE A BABY and then they aren't that person that is pregnant any more. 

It's likely my teeny tiny brain that always has a hard time reconciling this, but it still seems so sudden. And this time, I AM THE WOMAN.  9 months seems like a long time in some ways and in other ways, like the blink of an eye and you JUST SAW THAT WOMAN AND SHE NOW IS A MAMA HOLDING BABIES AND OH MY GODS HER LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME.

As I've stated before, I am the first woman to ever be pregnant and feel these strange feelings, so bear with me.  It's revolutionary, I know.  HOLD ONTO YOUR BONNETS!

I am so ready to have these babies.  Also?  I AM NOT AT ALL READY TO HAVE THESE BABIES.  I'm paralyzed by how much we haven't done to get ready.  We don't have the nursery that people keep asking about (due to the tiny apartment we live in) but we do have ALL THE THINGS FOR BABIES, SO MANY THINGS.  We don't have a plan in place for a nanny and when I go back to work, 5 months after Hall & Oates arrive.  I keep breathing deep and thinking my little mama will be with us for the first few weeks and she knows what she's doing, thank gods.  We don't have it all planned out and I'm freaking out and yet, and yet, I don't do anything to remedy the situation.

My dear sweet dumpster husband and I keep looking at each other and saying to ourselves and to each other, "IT WILL ALL BE FINE IT WILL ALL BE FINE IT WILL ALL BE FINE."  Which is absolutely true.  All we have to do is keep these babies alive and fed and changed and warm and nurtured and growing in a semi healthy way - both physically and mentally - and we'll all be fine.  Simple really.  *shakes head NOOOOO, not at all simple*

My Sponsor from day one kept saying two things to me, "more shall be revealed"  and "all is well".  And while I wanted to punch her in the throat for saying such nonsense, I now understand EXACTLY what she meant.  If I can keep saying these two things to myself in every area of my life, it makes it so much easier.  Try it.  Say it and then just breathe.  See?  I'm not just whistlin' dixie over here. 

There won't be too many more posts here with me enormously pregnant, and I know some of you are thankful for that.  Most of you though have been incredibly supportive and loving and fun to strap in with me and go on this ride.  And as far as the blog goes, "more shall be revealed".....see?  It's true.  It's evolving and it's still going to be sobriety first, babies second.  And everything else in between.  Life, you know?

52 comments:

  1. All is well. You've so got this. xo

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  2. Glorious! You, your belly, everything is just glorious! You look amazing, and I am so happy for you. And oh, you don't need a "nursery". You guys have a home and will be a family, and that's all you need. My boy never had a nursery, and he's doing alright. Love you, lady! xoxo

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  3. My twins are 3... I'm still not prepared. ;)

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    1. My brothers are 24 year old twins.....trust me, its an uphill battle but its great :)

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    2. My twins are also 3. I am never 100% prepared for what life throws at me with the two of them. But I am enjoying every minute of every day!! You rock Momma!!

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  4. The only thing you really need is a basket to keep them at hand in, (they're really little) blankets to cover them up, five billion itty bitty diapers and you. You'll be fine. I promise.

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  5. "More shall be revealed"... YES. And its corollary is also true: "You'll pick it up as you go along". Or: "Fake it till you make it". Both of which are my mantras, of sorts. You'll be swell! You'll be great! :)

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  6. I adore you... I'm going to missing seeing that cute preggie belly once Hall & Oats arrive.

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  7. "All we have to do is keep these babies alive and fed and changed and warm and nurtured and growing in a semi healthy way - both physically and mentally - and we'll all be fine. Simple really." <--- WORD.

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  8. Here is some cheese for you. You and your husband love eachother, you have everything your banies need! Good luck to you mama!

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  9. you're looking great!! I cant help but wonder how you don't topple over :)

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  10. You're looking fabulous!! I love your pics!! I cant help but wonder how the bump doesn't make you topple over :)

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  11. You are looking like a knockout that far along with twins! Everything is going to be ok. I'm a twin Mama to 7 year old boys. You will learn with them. Yes at times you will probably lose your shit but then I secretly think all moms do even though they say they don't. And juat remember all is well until they can start to walk...then I suggest backpack animals with tail leashes!

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    1. I lose my shit about once a week and I only have one. I freely admit it. Everything comes into place once the little ones arrive. Its like what the hell was I so worried about :)

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  12. You and hubby will do a wonderful job. I have 3 kids and I still play it by ear most days. Hubby and I are also sober (5 years for him, 3 for me) and we are so happy that our youngest has grown up in a healthy enviroment since before she was born and our older 2 see the difference in us and our lives. All will be well. Congrats to you!

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  13. Heather FrelichowskiDecember 10, 2012 at 10:55 AM

    Third pregnancy here (27 weeks in) and I am hyperventalating because I'm pretty sure I forgot how to keep a baby alive... Let alone remember how to diaper it. My older two are 7 and 9 so when I sleep in they can forage for themselves so they atleast don't starve to death. Which reminds me I must teach them how to do laundry otherwise we will have more and more underwear/pajama days around here. It's all just too much effort for me to even begin to worry about now. I'm taking my bedrest commanded self back to the couch with my jug of marshmallows from the lucky charms cereal. ;)

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  14. It will all be fine. A little secret that I learned between babies 1 and 3: Those little squishy babies will sleep anywhere. On your chest. In a crib. In a carseat. No nursery? No problem. IT WILL ALL BE FINE. I love you so friggin' much and am still weepy with joy for you and DH and these stinkin' babies!!!

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  15. All IS well. You have today. And you'll say the same thing tomorrow. You don't need a nursery, trendy stroller, or hipster diaper bag. Cute matchy matchy baby outfits only last exactly 1.5 weeks, but you don't really use them because you don't even want to leave the house anyway. You don't need plans, you have love. Babies like to shit all over plans anyway. You are amazing and I love you.

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  16. Every picture just looks more and more fantabulous-o!! Yeah, nursery shmursery! Counting down!!! :-)

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  17. You make me so freakin' happy every single day. I'm a super huge pessimist and I usually "hate everything" so the fact that I'm always eager to see your pictures and hear about your beautiful babies and and and and is a pretty big deal. Thanks for being awesome! Good luck Mama, you totally got this! Get ready for a ridiculous stupid, unexplainable, head exploding love! (times 2!!)

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  18. Christ on a bicycle, it will be more than just "fine"! It will be amazing and fantastic and perfect and entertaining and astonishing and miraculous and dazzling and delightfully challenging and everything you've ever dreamed of!!! :) You and DH have totally got this ~ piece of cake. Mmmmmmm, cake.....

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  19. I freaking LOVE you Katy! You GOT this. Christ on a cracker if there was anyone every MORE ready to be a mother ~~~I have never met her! Your journey is JUST beginning~ although you have been through SO very much to get HERE. One day at a time. One moment at a time. For today: you ARE enough and you HAVE enough. Hall and Oates are very lucky babies indeed.

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  20. I adore you and your baby belly pictures! I will miss the baby belly pics! You got this! :)

    Aishia

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  21. Your life will never be the same again... It will always be better!
    Newborns can sleep in their car seats for weeks - that's what we did, even though we had a baby room. (I had a c-section and it was easier for me to sleep on the couch with the baby next to me in his car seat, so I did.)

    BTW, you look fantastic!

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  22. There are so many 'self-help' books out there. About anything and everything. But I'll tell ya what... You won't know for sure what you're going to do, until those little rays of sunshine look into your eyes. Well, even then, you won't fully know or understand how in the world you are going to raise, feed, clothe, bathe, burp, etc. 2 babies at the same time, but, you will have a sense of confidence. My only advice I ever give to a first time mother (unless asked) is this: "Breathe, relax, and enjoy every minute of it. Even the poop and spit up. They grow soooo fast. They grow "up" soooo fast. Just enjoy them. You'll have plenty of time to get adjusted." My mom stayed with me for a week when each of my children were born. I have 3. They are 9, 12, and 14 now. I still ask for her advice and need her now and then. And yes, I may flip them off every once and a while behind their backs, and then smile when they turn around, but that's my choice, and I still wish they would stop growing up! I'm a fond stalker of your page and blog, and have never really written anything up until now. I just felt the need to let you know, that I have this tremenous feeling that you will be great at being a mother! I mean, you're a spaz for crying out loud! You're totally going to be in their little baby zone and talk baby spaz right along with them. You will all figure this out together. I'm not so sure where I heard this (input sarcasm here) but, Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're gonna get! (I really do know because the chocolate company puts a diagram on the lid as to what flavor is where!) But you get my drift. I will continue to be a fond stalker and absolutely cannot wait to hear more about your new journey. (Insert over used 80's rock lyric here) Don't stop believin'!

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  23. You are sooooo cute! I love the little tight bundle... they probably feel a bit big for you. :) Happy Holidays. :) Enjoy your growing family and love.

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  24. You look amazing. This is so exciting! I am 4 months preg with my second, and on my harder days I have to say reading your posts always makes me happy. You are a ray of sunshine!

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  25. Katy, I am SO HAPPY for you and DH. I started following you before baby Hall & Oates cam about and watching you on this journey to motherhood has been so marvelous <3 you are a truly exceptional woman and you will be an excellent mother. I, for one, will be sad to see the bump go bye-bye but knowing it will be replaced with two of the cutest little babies ever makes it bearable.

    Sending lots and lots of love from out west,

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  26. You're always smiling and so obviously in love with those babies, and to quote the Beatles 'all you need is love' everything else will fall into place with time. I heard a quote once that goes something like this 'the universe never gives you more than you can handle' and you are certainly handelling things. Take pleasure in the small things, relish each moment, and enjoy every second! Xxx

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  27. Thank you for always letting us come along for the ride and share with you. so excited. xo

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  28. You look amazing and completely adorable. All the feelings you have right now are NORMAL! Trust me when I say, it will all get done. Can't wait to hear when the babies are here!! :)

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  29. Babies are a wonderful gift. Idk what its like to have twins but I miss the days and nights of bottle feeding, changing poppies, and all that gross baby stuff. Wait till they are older. Whew. Talk about crazy. Sometimes I want to choke myself. But, then I think about the day I had them and smile again. Because if it weren't me that was their mom who would it be. I couldn't imagine my life without the two little buttheads I have.

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  30. I DID NOT GET A TISSUE ALERT.
    I'm bawling. Seriously. This girl...the one I've never met....I'm not related to her...NOTHING...Who KNEW I could grow to love you like I have? WHO FUCKING KNEW? I am so happy for yall. And, NO, I CAN'T BELIEVE they will be here. GIRL, YALL GOT THIS. You both have everything you need in your heart. That's it. I adore you and respect you more than I can ever explain. These damn interwebs are fuckin incredible...bringin you to me...Mucho luvo always. *spazz dance* Cyn
    A.D.D. Music Mamma

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  31. Come on, Dori... Just keep swimming, just keep swimming.

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  32. I have to read your blog to find out how you are and of course Hall and Oates and DH and young Jonathan et al. I have 5 big sproglets 2 of which have produced baby sproglets of their own...however many "mistakes" you make, you learn from them and go on from there. Your whole attitude is one of wonderful life, lets enjoy it together. Fantastic. Just carry on doing what you're doing, but slow down to enjoy it more, OK? Those babies will be here before you know it, and then you'll be freaking out, what did I do with my time before Hall and Oates got here??? I know i did, and sometimes still do but now in reverse as they have all left home. Yeah I miss them. But they come back. But I digress, kudos to you Katy, look forward to the next installment, Steph from across the Pond

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  33. I had to giggle when you said you weren't ready because that is usually a sure sign you are way more ready than you think. You got this. Ridiculously happy for you and DH.

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  34. Oh dear don't worry about the nursery and stuff like that. You dont need a whole bunch of clothes either. Bet you for the first 2 months they are sleeping in your bed or in a bassinet very close by anyway so what is the need for a nursery at that point? Also the best piece of advice I EVER got as a new mom was don't go buy a ginormous amount of clothing at one stage. Like newborn or 0-3m, they grow so fast they barely stay in them. My sponsor told me when my son was born to just get a few cute outfits that you really like and then just buy a bunch of white onsies and sleepers for around the house because they are MUCH easier to clean spit up out of. I tend to agree nowadays after 2 more but it still doesn't stop me from buying some adorable baby clothes sometimes :). I can't wait to meet Hall&Oates and I bet you they will the cutest biggest smilers ever just like their momma!

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  35. "I am so ready to have these babies. Also? I AM NOT AT ALL READY TO HAVE THESE BABIES." Oh man do I remember that feeling! You are SO going to be fine ;) You're going to be tired and a little stressed, but you'll feel beyond blessed and happy. And you won't have pregnant brain anymore, you'll have i-have-twin-babies brain ;)

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  36. Mine are in their late 30's with teenagers (he he he) and I still cannot believe I had them. Here's another platitude that will come in handy for the next 25 years: This too shall pass.

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  37. You are ready! You are SOOO ready! When my son came 5 weeks early-on the night I was supposed to start Lamaze classes--I had nothing-no crib, no clothes(shower was coming up in 2 days!), no strollers and so forth--all I had was diapers, and not disposable as they hadn't been invented yet!! My poor son slept in my neighbor's kids doll cradle, and clothes can be bought really quickly when people want an excuse to see you and the new baby!! Those first few weeks I slept with him in my bed most nights-and never fell asleep on him-I was too busy looking at him!! His toes and fingers fascinated me, his leg and arm rolls had to be kissed, and his crazy hair was the softest thing I had ever felt! No, I am not worried, not one bit, because you have the only thing those babies really need-LOVE!

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  38. I'm so happy for you! Wishing you the best, knowing that all will be wonderful!

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  39. You have the right thinking. Somehow it all just happens and everything works out. As a single mom of twins, I still am not sure how we survived that first year, but we did. The boys are almost six and thriving. Just hang in there, enjoy the madness and breathe through it. It is a wild ride!

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  40. To this day, I have no idea how you rock such awesome clothes and BOOTS with those babies hanging out on your front. I was a lumpy mess with ONE! Plus my feet swelled like little piggies! You look smoking hot, you have a great attitude, great DH and little momma, you dont need no stinkin nursery! Also, you may have yourself some little christmas babies! :) Devan

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  41. Keep 'em in there another 1.5 weeks and you will be golden. I am available to tandem nursing times and all things twins. Mine are 23 now, and they are the best! It will be fine. You are right!

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  42. I love the bump pictures!! But then I'll love the baby pictures too. Was your sponsor that turtle in Kung Fu Panda? She sounds so wise and prophet-like. I like those words, I'll keep breathing and thinking that too. Omm... Omm...
    How you aren't walking around in anything but flip flops and muumuus is beyond me. You rock sister.

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  43. Of all the hundreds of blogs that I follow, yours is honestly my favorite! Anybody that is ready for the pictures to stop, then they should move on to the next blog. Now, as for the babies, you will figure it all as you go. That is a fact. From the moment they are born, you will find yourself watching others with the babies, and NOBODY is going to do anything the right way...in your eyes. Feeding, bathing, burping, diapering, etc. My kids are 9 and 13, and I am still figuring it out, and let me just say, a 13 year old boy...it is hard to figure out. They are such buttholes sometimes (most of the time) and 9 year old girls...umm, that is a blog post in itself.
    I can not wait to follow you along this journey (because I am positive that you will somehow find the time to still post) and I know that yall will be great parents!

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  44. PLEASE. We LOVE the pregnancy pictures. You might not be the first woman to have ever gotten preggers, but by golly I think you just MIGHT be the most adorable! Continued happiness and prayers for you, Mr. Dumpster, and Hall and Oats. =)

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  45. I can say with absolute certainty, that telling a pregnant woman not to worry, is like telling the rain not to fall. Both usless and fantastical- like unicorns- will never happen.

    I can also say with absolute certainty, once those babies arrive, you'll see that all those worries will also seem a bit unicornish. They'll be like silly fairy tales in your memory. Of course there will be all sorts of new worries- the perks of being a parent I suppose- but once those babies arrive everything will fall into place, and you'll see those things with a whole new perspective.

    I told my husband 7 years ago, that if we keep waiting till we're "ready", we'll never have children. I truly believe no one is ever "ready" for that kind of thing. No amount of preparation can make up for the kind of skills learned by doing- on the fly- when it comes to children.

    Listen to me, sounding all wise-ish and stuff. You'd think I'd been doin this since the little house on the prairy days. Haha

    Just breathe darlin. And your sponsor is SO right :)

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  46. You are exactly where you need to be. Thank you so much for sharing this journey with us/me. Your peace, excitement, sarcasm, and strength have brightened my days.

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  47. I have a 5 year old daughter and 3 and a half year old twin sons (one of the twins was diagnosed with cancer at 3 months old, and his brother was diagnosed with complex partial seiures at 13 months) So yes. Things will be fine. Life will throw things at you. HARD things, things you don't think you'll get through. You will cry. You will laugh, you will want to scream. Through it all? You will have those BEUTIFUL GIFTS to wrap your arms around and hug and love. I have greatly enjoyed reading your blog! I look forward to reading more about your adventures once those sweet babies are here. You always put a smile on my face!

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  48. Gurrrrrrl look at you! Beautiful! You can do this, love will help you.

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  49. Doesn't this feel like SO LONG AGO?! haha :)

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